Mr Neve

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Mr. Neve is an English teacher at BRGS. He is also head of the Drama Dept. He was once good friends with Will Young, and knows almost every celebrity a student could think of.

Mr Neve has directed two of the school's Dramatic and Musical productions to date; Les Miserables and The Wizard Of Oz, both of which were amazing successes.

He has starred in Casualty and a random film. Nobody actually knows what the film is apart from possibly Miss Ogle.

Well known for calling his students "darling".

Is also fond of the semi colon.

Thinks reading dictionaries is fun.

Always has a squeaky board pen, sounds like he's murdering a cat with a cheese grater...

Does a rather excellent Zombie impression, as seen at Wizard Of Oz Chorus Rehersal.


  • The Nevester - Courtesy of Jono, Joe D, Sheepy and Colm.
  • Dictionary Boy - Courtesy of 7B.
  • MC Nevey - Courtesy of Joe D and Sheepy.
  • Neveybaby - Courtesy of his A2 drama set of 2009.

Mr Neve also has a popular song chanted as he enters the classroom by 8R, to the tune of 'When the Saints'

And Mr Neve
And Mr Neve
Is Wonderful
Is Wonderful
Oh Mr Neve is wonderful, and how I long to be in his classroom, oh Mr Neve is wonderful

Song created by: Watkins, Parki, Beefy, Jordie.C and Miniman!!!!

Now by request of Nevey, we unfortunatly are only allowed to sing this on a Friday afternoon as it was getting to disruptive. Also to Miss Hayes annoyance, we have to sing it with vocals. Which we got told off for practising to 'Surprise' Nevey. 8R also have a variation of Mr Parkinson's ever popular Freitag Man.


"I have Jewish hair"

    • TREVOR! i need you.... (with a perverted smile)

Neve: Right who can do this for me? Colm Kennedy gets up and writes of the whiteboard "I love Mr Neve"
Neve: Well that's lovely, can you answer the question?

Someone: So Sir, do you have any children?
Neve: No
Someone: Do you have a wife?
Neve: No
Someone: Do you have a girlfriend Sir?
Neve: No
Someone: So does that mean your single then sir?
Neve: No (big grin)

  • Jack: "Sir, can I go for my music lesson?"

Mr Neve: "No" (A minute later)

Mr Neve: "Oh go on then. No one talk to him. No don't even look at him, he can leave the room in TOTAL DISGRACE for missing my lesson"

Joe Donnely: "You look very young for your age sir." Neve: "I've had a lot of work done, it's all plastic surgery."

Pupil: Sir, what does quintessentially mean?
Neve: Em, something that is in its most natural or perfect form. For example, you could say I am quintessentially flamboyant.

Neve: "Now get on with your work"

Alex: "Sir I've finished!" Miles: "Swat!"

Neve: "He's not a swat, he just wants to go far in life"

Alex: "Thanks sir that makes it sound so much better!"

8R complain about the squeaky board pen, he reaches into the drawer and pulls out a tube of mascara, and goes to the board with it. He opens it, and upon finding it was mascara, not a pen: Mr Neve:Oops, Miss Stricklands Mascara. Class:Really Sir? Mr Neve:(runs finger across eye and inspects it)Maybe not...

You, Outside!

Neve Storms Out

During a year 10 drama lesson Mr Neve played Amber's husband (Amber from 10S) argued with her about her having an affair then hid in the costume closet then the class suddenly heard a bang as Mr Neve leaves the closet carrying a large breiefcase screaming "Im Leaving!" while leaving a trail of women's clothes and furry handcuffs and head boppers!!! :)


During a year 11 (2006 intake) drama lesson, Mr Neve was attempting to show Jacob Cappelli how to sit in a more manly posture. After several failed attempts, Mr Neve told him to 'imagine he had genitalia like grapefruits', and to act accordingly. The whole class spent pretty much the remainder of the lesson in fits of hysterics, and now all it takes it for the word 'grapefruit' to be mentioned to set everybody off again. He explicitly told us not to put this story on the student wiki, so surprise, surprise, here it is. '