Mr Jackson

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Head of Science

Mrjackson physics.jpg

Hmm...not much is yet known of the mysterious being that is Mr Jackson.

He is not often seen outside of his office where he derives great pleasure from having brews. This is one of the only known things about him, and explains why he is seldom in his Physics lessons. He was the rather stressed out form tutor of 8B and appears to enjoy shouting so loud you can't understand what he says and then immediately talking in a stupidly quiet voice of which no one can understand! He sometimes does the register but usually just marks everyone down as being present. Mr Jackson is physicly unable to make a regognizeable difference in his voice between the two names Allan and Ellen.

He delivers his lessons and at such a fast pace that sometimes even he does not follow what he is talking about. He pauses only to say "okay" and "you got that?", when it's blatantly clear nobody has a clue. He often veers off at tangents, but people tend not to notice as the tone of voice and the pace of his speech do not alter.

Has been known to hit a student with a pair of goggles round the head apparently accidentally.

He no longer attends the school.


  • This happened a lot in Year 11 and also 10: after reeling off a very long explanation to something we quite clearly didn't understand at the time, he would say - "but anyway, you don't need to know that, that's A-Level stuff."
  • "Anybody go ski-ing during the holidays?" (at random point in a lesson, bemused class look on silently) "No, neither did I."
  • "hmm, yes, ok, right, hmm yes, what was I talking about?"
  • "What's the drug scene like in Helmshore? Can you get heroin easily?"
  • "I swear they have green sheep at Sellafield."
  • "Yeah?"
  • "Okay folks - be quiet."
  • "So, if you just look at this diagram showing heat convection then did anyone watch Big Brother by the way?" (Said as a single stream of speech with no pause)
  • "Okay." (57 times in thirty minutes)
  • Rachel: "Ha Ha as if you're naturally ginger..."
    • Mr. Jackson: "Hey! What's wrong with gingers? My daughter's ginger.... I'm ginger..."
      • Rachel: "Are you really?!!"
        • Mr. Jackson: "Errr no, I have no hair...."
  • "Let's imagine for a minute that Wales gets entirely one will miss it..."
  • (To Adam Jackson, in reference to possible relation:) "We could be related because my daughter is ginger."
    • Adam Jackson: "Ye, but my dad ain't bald!"
  • Student: "You know there are some people that hide behind speed cameras with a flash camera and take photos when cars pass so they think they've been flashed."
    • Mr Jackson: "Oh really?" *Mischievous grin*
  • "If there was a mouse there, and I had a radioactive gun, I could kill it."
  • Student: "Is it possible to be hit by a satellite?"

Mr Jackson: "Yeah, that was in the news recently. A guy was trampolining and he went so high that he got killed by a passing satellite."

  • "GRRRR! Your the worst form I've had in 12 years!!!"
  • "Siddown!"

Jackson is a common name at BRGS