Mr Haycocks
Mr Haycocks had a wide and varied history at BRGS, from English teacher to Head of IT, from Head of English to Webmaster. In his current incarnation, he has filled Doc Rob's King-Sized boots when the grandmaster himself retired at the end of 2007. A king amongst Teachers making English tolerable again. He left at the end of the 2009 - 2010 term.
Secret Lemonade Ginger
Despite many years of cultivating a darkened 'do, it is known to some of the more wily BRGS students that Don Haycogrio has a not-so-dark secret: he's ever so slightly redheaded. This is only slightly obvious by his dyed, jet black hair and outrageously ginger sideburns.
Quotes
- "Adam where is your brain? Still in Robert's crotch?"
- To woman in The Jolly Sailor: Don't be a stranger.
- To Heskey in English Language lesson: James, may I just say that you are looking sexual today.
- While handing a student a funsize Cadbury Fudge: Here you go Lewis, go and pack yourself full of fudge
- Maybe Romeo was thinking with his little head rather than his big head, but don't put that in your coursework
- Said with ruler down his pants to illustrate opening scene of Romeo and Juliet, Me they shall feel while I am able to stand, flipping the bendy ruler which was down his pants open... He then spotted a flexi-ruler and exclaimed, This would have been better!.
- There are lots of ways to seriously disturb a child (Talking about playing peek-a-boo)
- For the last five minutes we'll do solvent sniffing
- Friday night I dress up in a nappy and a dummy and go down to a fetish club and have a whale of a time(When someone commented on how much he seemed to enjoy making the baby noises)
- Would you go and rub off the penis please Heskey? (Referring to a penis drawn on the door-window between Room 74 and 83.)
Mr Haycocks: "I have 34 frogs in my pond" Al: "You sat and counted them?" Mr Haycocks: "Yeah!"
- My favourite musical as a child was The Sound of Music... I really should have been gay.
- Did you know that a certain scientist believed all adopted males would find it kinky to get it on with their biological mothers? ...I'm adopted.
- In an American accent: Afta: I've 'ad ma brother, Ah'll 'av sex wi' the chickens!
- Oh Jade, I could just thrust my tongue down your throat - but that'd be very inappropriate!
- Gazza - Tell us about your kok! (Discussing the phonology of children's words. kok being the phonological spelling of the word the child was attempting to say)]]
- Up against the wall please Heskey. (Taking pictures for the 'Little Shop of Horrors' programme)
- [computer in classroom isn't working]
Al: Treat it like a lady sir! Mr Haycocks in odd purring voice: Oooooo, come on (stroking the monitor lovingly)
- Student: All this talk of cream is making me feel hot.
Mr Haycocks: Save it for later Student: You mean for you, don't you sir? Mr Haycocks smiles and nods enthusiastically.
