Christopher Haworth

Where to start or better when

Well, it all began at the tender age of four when he got accepted into the world known as Helmshore County Primary School, and from there it went down hill, all the way though two schools, two of attempts at the BRGS entrance exam - both resulting in failure - and a piece of paper that officially says he's not stupid, he's 'special'. And then it all got louder, very quickly.

The Music

Chris loves heavy metal. The louder the better. To Chris, everything else (apart from little snippits of other equally loud things) is just dull and monotonus; There its said so PFFRRTTTTT. Since he and Sam have managed to manopolise the CD player in the Lower Common Room, much to the dismay of the majority, they are contiung the fine tradition of rock music, dataing back as far as... well, at least the time his brother Richard Haworth was around, since he also helped to contribute to this persona of the LCR. He hopes to find someone worthy to continue this "tradition" on throughout then next year, when he will be long gone and feel sutibly old.

Suprisingly, Christopher also has a slight tendancy towards listening to Del Amitri, which came to a suprise to 90%//all of his friends. A favourite at the moment is 'Roll to Me' and 'Tell her this'.

'THE' Bike

Christopher's long lost love, 'The' Bike is permanatley attatched to his backside, terrorising the roads of Haslingden, or 'Upper Helmoshore' as he fondly calls it, to avoid any association with Haslingden what so ever. Failing miserably to convert Becky Lord to the 'bike loving', he is doomed to forever ride these lonely streets alone, and occasionally drag her to Halfords.

bikes gained so far

• the 'specialised Hard rock' blue one that he adores oh so very much.
• A BMX that cost him £70.
• A red one thats in his garage. in sevral pieces.
• The gold one he bent frame in half of.
• The Black One that died an over used death.

Im a Special boy...

Well he is and he have a certificate to prove it. Since he has lost most of his shame already, anything you can thow at me him will no doubt be thrown back, twice as hard, and with pin-point accuracy. Unless he's pissed at the time, which is very likely. Either way, he'll have a damn good laugh as he does it. Some people may feel he has taken things to sligt exess, most of which have been presnt at some of the same gigs or partys that he has attended.

During one Physics lesson, Chris somehow managed to come up with a fantastic theory on how the Universe is Switzerland. If this piece of information confuses you as it would any normal, straight-thinking person, then go and ask him about it yourself.

I Would Like To Thank....

Chris wishes it to be known that he could not have done this on his own, and it is due to the faithfull (some may say brainless) support from Mr Samuel Walton and the marvellous, fantastic and wonderous Becky Lord. He could not have become half of what he is today without these people.

Some Final Words

"Come on, life is dull if you just sit about! So next time you feel like complaining at me for being loud and obnoxius, just remember, I'm special so it's not my fault. (What an ace get out clause. WOO!) But there you are me in about that many words, and now (hopefully with the help of Simon to make it all make some sort of sense) I will leave my own little notch on the bed post of Brgs!"

Quotes

• "F**k off or I'll burn you"

• "Boyo" -Can be used to refer to practically any one of his close male (and on ocassion female) friends, it takes years of practice and skill to distinguish just which 'Boyo' he may be talking about at any particular time.

• "And theres the table. And there is the patio doors and there is a shed...". Christopher claims that this 'forward thinking' is the way he manages to focus when hes drunk. Everyone else just thinks its a load of his usual verbal diarrhea escaping, him only usuing extreme intoxication as an excuse for being a tosser.

• "You cant beat a nice creamy rim job"

• This is not a quote by Chris, it is a quote from someone impersonating Chris...though it works just as well :)

[explaining why Chris likes Metal] 'It's loud, it's agreesive, it's sweaty, it's in your face, I'm Chris and I like listing things'-Nic

• In a serious tone "I'm actually one of the most normal people you will ever meet" (safe to say the only response this received was laughter from all present eg. Dani and Becky)