Mr King

Mr King is sadly now no longer with us, having left for Haslingden High School. He is now head of Science there and presumably on a better wage than previously. A former pupil, he was prefect to 7G in 1999 (best prefect ever, along with crazy-pants-Phil in Year 9), and somehow acquired the nickname 'Dougal' (or maybe 'Doogle', or 'Doogal'... I don't know how you would spell it). Also does a hilarious dance to Club Tropicana...

Quotes

Error creating thumbnail: Unable to save thumbnail to destination

A rather unflattering photo

• "Aerosmith are the BEST!"

• "Right! Shut UP! (bangs something big and heavy on the table) Ow my head..." [This is behaviour congruent with Mr Fuller's use of a filing cabinet to silence a class, but with less apparent effectiveness.]

• (Whilst looking REALLY ill) "Right... I'm just going to the Prep Room to... erm ...yeah"

• "Call me Dr King... (to Sam McAuley) JOKE!"

• "Look... I asked you to name 3 Aerosmith albums as a JOKE... to remind you it wasn't the real thing... Look it was a JOKE alright, the marks meant NOTHING" (again mainly addressed to Sam McAuley)

• "KROOLLL! I'm melting" (whilst being wrapped in England flag put up by Kroll"

• "Now Kroll listen to me if you don't put my Scotland flag back up by 8 o'clock I will personally make sure you are on kitchen duty for the rest of the week"

• "For the love of God don't write that crap down!! It's like black magic!" (Mr.King writes the t-test formula on the board, upper 6th pick up pens ready to copy it down. By the way, it can be found here. Look at the formula itself. Now you understand.)

• (On seeing a bright red sunburnt back) "That skin will peal and we can make a chair out of it with sheep piss"

• "SHUT IT! *mutters under breath* tit..."

• "No! Don't! I'll get sued!" [On being hugged by Lamby]

• After randomly writing "wak" on Lewis Brady's test "thats wak"

• "OI! i cant hear myself p.. think!.. I would have said pissing think but that would have been bad wouldn't it"

Demonstrations

• "I need a volunteer..." (looks at small people in class - however, David Groom volunteers)
• "Great... I get to compete against Judo Uk or whatever you are now...
• Right I'm going to show you exploitation..." (David and Mr King sit at opposite ends of a desk with 12 gluesticks in the middle)
• "Say David needs 4 Gluesticks to survive and I need. 8 we compete (he says grabbing them) for the resource... I have 9 David didn't even try so if he were a plant he'd be dead. HE loses..."

• "Now interference is different. Here I have a metre ruler (pokes David in chest with ruler) Now I'm keeping David away from the food source...

• (David sits limply) ...COMPETE David!!! (David tries to reach gluesticks)

• (whilst laughing)...I can get all 12 if I want to!! HA"

• "Amensalism is slightly different again... I'm going to put away the ruler... Now David go stand in the middle of the room and you can compete from there...

• (puts pins all over David's stool)

• ... Now we can compete... David... you didn't even reach the stool that time!! Again David would be dead and I would live to procreate little Mini-me's everywhere..."

Sad things Mr King enjoys

1- Latin. Mr King still enjoys reading Latin and has a "Latin Game" on his Laptop. Once he joked whilst discussing bio-accumulation "If I hear anyone say piscus minimus, piscus maximus again I'll Scream" Most of the class had blank faces except for Stuart who laughed and explained that it meant "little fish- big fish"

2- The History of the Napoleonic Wars. According to Mr Grehan Mr King knows more about this subject than either he or Mr Elkington

3- Books on Quantum Physics. On Year 9 Camp 2006 he brought a book on that subject with him when we went for the 'Mountain Biking Activity'. And he even found time to read it.

Mr King's Laptop

Mr King's Laptop, apart from having an outrageously large number of Aerosmith pictures on is called "Mithrandir" and automatically loads MSN whenever it is turned on... Attempts to read this address failed. He, over the course of the school year 2005-2006, admitted to 8S that his brother, Graham works at the Ministry of Defence and collects cacti.

Music Taste

• Megadeth are great - I just like the guitar work.

• Once during a quiz on drugs cigarettes and alcohol, as a bonus question he played Smoke on the water and asked us to guess the name of it. He was horrified that only 2 people seemed to know, and even more horrified when some people thought the song was called Motorhead!

• If he ever starts talking about Aerosmith just tell him about the time when they were all so stone that every member of the band was playing a different song and they didn't notice.