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Geographer's Description

Waterfoot, today

Waterfoot is a small town in East Lancashire sited on the confluence point of the River Irwell and the Whitewell Brook. The town grew up with the Industrial Revolution and at one point students were able to travel to BRGS on the East Lancs Railway.

Facilities and Features

Waterfoot boasts various eating establishments, including two chippies, a corner shop, bakers, a Post Office, three off-licenses and an array of pubs. Especially noteworthy is The Royal where many Sixth Form functions were held before its closure. However by far and away, currently the best feature of Waterfoot (excluding BRGS), is the road out.

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Since then Waterfoot has become a small run-down seedy dump. If you happen to go there after school hours you will see most of its chav inhabitants (mainly Fearns drop-outs) hanging around the Co-op and the Library. They are almost all anti-social and gather in gangs to drink White Lightning and smoke fags from the Coca-Cola Shop. Don't speak to them as they are unable to communicate with you on an equal basis. Thus, they feel as though their territory is under dispute (strength of instinct does not reflect that of vocabulary) and will speedily resort to violence.

The other type of individual that resides in this area is the dreaded "O.A.P" (from the Latin "Osteo Arthriticus Pedus" meaning Feet of Joint Pain; hence, the ride-on lawnmower-shopping-cart-hybrid machines many have resorted to). Similarly to the chav, these half-human half-lawnmower/shopping-cart cyborgs also move in small groups, although their Base of Operations is the Post Office, where they, upon sighting a fully human being, move infuriatingly slowly and spontaneously create queues, thereby ensuring no-one can get anything done with any required haste. For your own safety, do not even look at these robo-individuals as they will throw you dirty looks just for being young and start talking about "the youth of today...".

A full list of food emporiums is located here.