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German is the oddest language to ever be taught at BRGS - since you can only really speak it after your German Oral. Students slowly learn to speak more after each different exam!

The year 10 textbook is also very strange. We were meant to read a paragraph in german and then answer questions about it. One of the question was "How does the female sports teacher please you" The correct answer was "She is totally excellent"!

"Frau Ward Ist Ein Dumme Khue"

A song learnt in GCSE German- Mr Ward said his wife wouldn't mind...this may well be as she is just him without the beard.

Other songs include the likes of " the German word for foggy" to the theme tune of neighbours, and "Mein hut es hat drei Ecken", teaching you nothing, but still amusing to see Herr ward go "mm mm mm mm mm mm. Mm mm mm mm mm mm. Mm mm mm mm mm mm. Mm mm mm mm mm mm mm." at the end of the song.


Most of Mr Ward's lessons would include a video - usually 'Hallo aus Berlin!' which starred "Rolli und Rita" (less of the 'fool' please- haven't seen the vid in 3yrs!). Videos such as 'Hallo aus Berlin!' and that amusing "sitcom" are etched into the memories of some former GCSE students, even 3 years down the road. The best video, that everyone should get to watch is Ding-Dong. It teaches yuo nothing about the language, but it's really funny. If you haven't seen it, ask your german teacher if you can. If you don't do german ask your language teacher if you can see it anyway. You will never forget the sheer randomness. The brilliance of the German course offered becomes apparent when people who've not done any German to speak of can get full marks in a German language general studies paper, the same 3 years down the line. Wow!


Mr Ward takes great pleasure of being able to swear at, and insult, his students in German, often calling their work 'Schiesse' and the students themselves 'Schiesse Kopf's'...and less gifted students often hear 'Dummkopf' or 'Mein Gott' with regard to poorly answered questions.He also Let 07N Read his little book of Naughty german swear words if they answered a question right.

Poo Buckets

This occured when the current 10G were in year 7 and being taught by Mr. Parkinson. After a student answered a question wrong he said, "I should pour a bucket of poo over your head" He then carried on to talk about rigging up a system of poo buckets on pulleys in the floor tiles (Which every adventurous student knows can be lifted up to provide an escape route from Doc Rob)and connectin them to buttons on his desk. The idea was that when a student got a question wrong the bucket would empty on them. He then extended te idea, so that the bucket would empty no matter how they answered the question. Then there was the topic of different colours of poo for different year groups, e.g. year 7 would have a sloppy yellow, and year 8s could have a hard green, etc. A highly amusing lesson.