Difference between revisions of "Mr Hoyle"

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[[Image:187.jpg|thumb|Mr Hoyle looking like a retarded child with his helpers on an [[Iceland Trip]]]]
 
[[Image:187.jpg|thumb|Mr Hoyle looking like a retarded child with his helpers on an [[Iceland Trip]]]]
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*Mr Hoyle is a [[Geography]] teacher at BRGS. He is famed for how he says sedimentary rock and telling his classes about his Polish wife. He appears to have quite a passion for his subject, often getting cross if people do not understand geographical facts the first time around. As with most teachers in the school, he has his "own room" - which, for Mr Hoyle, is room 32. He has a liking for the band Nick Cave and The Bad Seeds
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*Mr Hoyle is a [[Geography]] teacher at BRGS. He is famed for how he says sedimentary rock and telling his classes about his Polish wife. He appears to have quite a passion for his subject, often getting cross if people do not understand geographical facts the first time around. As with most teachers in the school, he has his "own room" - which, for Mr Hoyle, is room 32. He has a liking for the band Nick Cave and The Bad Seeds.
  
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*is it me or does he talk like he has golf balls stuffed up his nose?
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=In brief=
 +
* Has a more than strange way of talking: for example, instead of saying 'human' he would say 'U-man'.
 +
* Famous for his unibrow, or, as it is known to commoners, monobrow.
  
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* He is also famed for his HUGE mono-brow
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=Quotes=
  
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*Sometimes his eyes point outwards
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==Photographs==
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* Mr Hoyle shows his GCSE class of 05-07 a slideshow of photos showing different living conditions in Blackburn:
  
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* Has a more than strange way of talking, instead of saying human he would say U-man.
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Hoylatron: "I took these photos"
  
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* He talks like Frank Spencer, if you ever hear him speak just imagine him finishing his sentence with "OOOOOOH BETTY!!!"
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Students [shout together]: "No you didn't sir, we saw these pictures about 3 years ago! Mr Spencer showed them to us!"
  
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Hoylatron: "No, I really did!"
  
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Students:"NO YOU DIDNT!"
  
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==Holidays==
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Hoylatron: "Oh okay, just a little white lie."
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*Last year, he went to India.  
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==Quotes==
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* Mr Hoyle shows his GCSE class of 05-07 a slideshow of photos showing different living conditions in Blackburn:
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* Mr Hoyle: "This looks like a nice city - but if you look ''here'' you will notice this part where all the scums live."
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Hoylatron, "I took these photos" students shout together, "no you didnt sir, we saw these pictures about 3 years ago, Mr Spencer showed them to us!" "No i really did!!" "NO YOU DIDNT!" "Oh okay, just a little white lie"
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*"we're gun'ta.." [we are going to]
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Random student: "IT'S BLACKBURN"
  
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==Attire==
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* Pupil: "Sir, where did you get your jacket from?"
  
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*Pupil: "Sir, where did you get your jacket from?"
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Mr Hoyle: "Burtons. Jacket, trousers, shoes, tie and shirt all for £100. Bargain." [short silence while still staring at the pupil] "You should buy your school uniform from Burtons too. Oh no, they only do mens clothes."
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*Mr Hoyle: "Burtons. Jacket, trousers, shoes, tie and shirt all for £100. Bargain." [short silence while still staring at the pupil] "You should buy your school uniform from Burtons too. Oh no, they only do mens clothes."
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*"Sedimentary rocks."
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* Student: Sir, why would you buy three-quarter-length waterproof pants?
  
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[At the end of registration]
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Hoyle: What? I'm not wearing....
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*"STOP! WHERE ARE YOU ALL GOING?! I HAVEN'T READ THE NOTICES OUT YET!"
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*"Oh yes I have. Off you go to your next lesson."
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Student: I know, I know, I just wondered why they sell them...
  
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[Upon explaining what discharge is measured in to the class]
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Hoyle: Well, the water drips off lower down your leg, so it's more comfortable
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*"Discharge is measured in cumecs, which is how many cubic metres [writes "cum" on the board] pass a point per second [adds "secs" to the board to form a word] which is why it is called...[notices what he has just written and the class starts laughing]..oops, not that."
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[[Category:Teachers|Hoyle]]
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Student: Eh?
  
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''<five minute explanation about advantages of three-quarter-length waterproof jackets>''
  
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*Mr Hoyle walks in to a lesson, bangs into the cupboard, and realises it is locked. Walks out. Comes back in a few minutes later with several hundreds of keys on a keyring. Spends a while trying to find the right key while the class he's walked in on laughs at him. Finally finds the right key, goes in the cupboard, gets what he wants then hurries back out.
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Student: No, three-quarter-length PANTS!
  
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*at the start of the lessom mr hoyle walks in and notices a puddle of water on his desk. tells student why it is there, student says that they dont know why the water is there. he tells the student to clear it up. on the way to the door to get the paper towels he says "where are you going?" student replys "you told me to clean it up sir" hoyle replys with "well i dont whant you to now, go sit down"  confused student sits back down
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Hoyle: Oh, pants? Sorry, I thought you meant jackets. Well, it's just personal preference really, I suppose they're cooler and more practical in hot countries, to keep your legs cool.
  
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Student: But then you'd get your feet wet.
  
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*In 9S geography 05/06
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Hoyle: What? You wouldn't wear them when it was raining.
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*walks round with fly undone*
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Martyn sends a note to him "sir your fly is undone"
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Mr Hoyle sends a note back
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"Martyn your shirt is untucked"
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*Whole class laughs continously for the remainder of the lesson*
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Student: Then why are they waterproof?
  
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Hoyle: Oh, you mean WATERPROOF three-quarter-lengths? Erm. I have no idea.
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==Miscellaneous==
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* "We're gun'ta.." [we are going to]
 +
* "Sedimentary rocks."
 +
* "STOP! WHERE ARE YOU ALL GOING?! I HAVEN'T READ THE NOTICES OUT YET!........Oh... yes I have. Off you go to your next lesson."
 +
* "Discharge is measured in cumecs, which is how many cubic metres [writes "cum" on the board] pass a point per second [adds "secs" to the board to form a word] which is why it is called...[notices what he has just written and the class starts laughing]..oops, not that."
 +
* In 9S geography 05/06, Mr Hoyle walks round with fly undone. Martyn sends a note to him: 'Sir, your fly is undone.' Mr Hoyle sends a note back: "Martyn, your shirt is untucked."
 
* In 9R's lesson a rebellious child has flicked chewing gum onto the interactive board...
 
* In 9R's lesson a rebellious child has flicked chewing gum onto the interactive board...
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"That wasn't there before, who put it there?"...*pulls it off*...*stretches it between fingers*...*smells it*..."Mmm, juicy fruit, my favourite!"...shows girl sat next to the bin his marvellous find...and pops it in the bin. Whole class sits in shock!
 
  
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* 11S registration - "I'm not blaming anyone, but I know it was you two."
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Hoyle: That wasn't there before, who put it there?
  
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* Mr Hoyle: *points at white board* "This looks like a nice city, but if you look here you will notice this part where all the scums live"
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[pulls it off, stretches it between fingers and smells it]
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Random student: *shouts out loud* "IT'S BLACKBURN"
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Hoyle: Mmm, juicy fruit, my favourite!
  
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*Student: Sir, why would you buy three-quarter-length waterproof pants?
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[shows girl sat next to the bin his marvellous find... and pops it in the bin. Whole class sits in shock.]
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*Hoyle: What? I'm not wearing....
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* 11S registration - "I'm not blaming anyone, but I know it was you two."
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*Student: I know, I know, I just wondered why they sell them...
+
 
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*Hoyle: Well, the water drips off lower down your leg, so it's more comfortable
+
[[Category:Teachers|Hoyle]]
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*Student: Eh?
+
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''<five minute explanation about advantages of three-quarter-length waterproof jackets>''
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*Student: No, three-quarter-length PANTS!
+
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*Hoyle: Oh, pants? Sorry, I thought you meant jackets. Well, it's just personal preference really, I suppose they're cooler and more practical in hot countries, to keep your legs cool.
+
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*Student: But then you'd get your feet wet.
+
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*Hoyle: What? You wouldn't wear them when it was raining.
+
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*Student: Then why are they waterproof?
+
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*Hoyle: Oh, you mean WATERPROOF three-quarter-lengths? Erm. I have no idea.
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Revision as of 20:45, 8 November 2006

Mr Hoyle looking like a retarded child with his helpers on an Iceland Trip
  • Mr Hoyle is a Geography teacher at BRGS. He is famed for how he says sedimentary rock and telling his classes about his Polish wife. He appears to have quite a passion for his subject, often getting cross if people do not understand geographical facts the first time around. As with most teachers in the school, he has his "own room" - which, for Mr Hoyle, is room 32. He has a liking for the band Nick Cave and The Bad Seeds.

In brief

  • Has a more than strange way of talking: for example, instead of saying 'human' he would say 'U-man'.
  • Famous for his unibrow, or, as it is known to commoners, monobrow.

Quotes

Photographs

  • Mr Hoyle shows his GCSE class of 05-07 a slideshow of photos showing different living conditions in Blackburn:

Hoylatron: "I took these photos"

Students [shout together]: "No you didn't sir, we saw these pictures about 3 years ago! Mr Spencer showed them to us!"

Hoylatron: "No, I really did!"

Students:"NO YOU DIDNT!"

Hoylatron: "Oh okay, just a little white lie."

  • Mr Hoyle: "This looks like a nice city - but if you look here you will notice this part where all the scums live."

Random student: "IT'S BLACKBURN"

Attire

  • Pupil: "Sir, where did you get your jacket from?"

Mr Hoyle: "Burtons. Jacket, trousers, shoes, tie and shirt all for £100. Bargain." [short silence while still staring at the pupil] "You should buy your school uniform from Burtons too. Oh no, they only do mens clothes."

  • Student: Sir, why would you buy three-quarter-length waterproof pants?

Hoyle: What? I'm not wearing....

Student: I know, I know, I just wondered why they sell them...

Hoyle: Well, the water drips off lower down your leg, so it's more comfortable

Student: Eh?

<five minute explanation about advantages of three-quarter-length waterproof jackets>

Student: No, three-quarter-length PANTS!

Hoyle: Oh, pants? Sorry, I thought you meant jackets. Well, it's just personal preference really, I suppose they're cooler and more practical in hot countries, to keep your legs cool.

Student: But then you'd get your feet wet.

Hoyle: What? You wouldn't wear them when it was raining.

Student: Then why are they waterproof?

Hoyle: Oh, you mean WATERPROOF three-quarter-lengths? Erm. I have no idea.

Miscellaneous

  • "We're gun'ta.." [we are going to]
  • "Sedimentary rocks."
  • "STOP! WHERE ARE YOU ALL GOING?! I HAVEN'T READ THE NOTICES OUT YET!........Oh... yes I have. Off you go to your next lesson."
  • "Discharge is measured in cumecs, which is how many cubic metres [writes "cum" on the board] pass a point per second [adds "secs" to the board to form a word] which is why it is called...[notices what he has just written and the class starts laughing]..oops, not that."
  • In 9S geography 05/06, Mr Hoyle walks round with fly undone. Martyn sends a note to him: 'Sir, your fly is undone.' Mr Hoyle sends a note back: "Martyn, your shirt is untucked."
  • In 9R's lesson a rebellious child has flicked chewing gum onto the interactive board...

Hoyle: That wasn't there before, who put it there?

[pulls it off, stretches it between fingers and smells it]

Hoyle: Mmm, juicy fruit, my favourite!

[shows girl sat next to the bin his marvellous find... and pops it in the bin. Whole class sits in shock.]

  • 11S registration - "I'm not blaming anyone, but I know it was you two."
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