Dr Ellis

Dr Ellis appeared in a L6 Christmas Quiz in the "Teacher Baby Photos" round. Incidentally, his team won the quiz, and he was presented his certificate in a Year 7 Year assembly, so he could be applauded by his form. Stage fright kicked in, somewhat.

More commonly known as Trellis.

Quotes

• "Nobody's listening to me..."

• "When I die I won't have Rigor Mortis. But when someone notices I'm not around, and they find me in a couple of weeks time, then I'll have Rigor Mortis!" (worth pointing out that this isn't true, as Rigor Mortis fades after 72 hours)

• When asked if he wanted to be buried, cremated, pickled or fried when dead "I want to be cut up an fed to the pigs. It's more environmentally friendly".

• In one of his end of topic revision tests, "Charles Darwin was Born with a Beard".

• In same test..."True or false. DNA DOES stand for Deoxyidonotlooklikejohnosheaneuclaic acid"

• Drellis - It's just like milking a shrew

Student - why would you want to milk a shrew? Drellis - (like it is the most obvious thing in the world) To get shrew milk!"

Fishy Ones

• "All my fish are called "Bob" and "Fred""

Student: Why do you call them Bob sir? Dr Ellis: (again like it is the most obvious thing in the world) Because that's what they call each other. (opens mouth like fish) Bob Bob Bob.

• "How do you tell if a fish is female?"

• "How do you tell if a fish is pregnant?"

• "Do you think I need more fish?"