Jake Sutcliffe

Jake Sutcliffe, in 08B, is even madder than Ben Pointon. He likes the word "purple", the asdf movie and 'cyanide and happiness' videos on youtube. Jake has the uncanny ability to damage his eye. In year 7, he ran into a table and ended up with a black eye. Jake is one of only a few 'clever cloggs', or 'swots' as most people say, in 08.

Nicknames

• Splendid
• Mr Splendid
• Effilctus (his last name backwards)
• Jakers

Hobbies

• Playing guitar.
• Playing the tenor horn.
• Going to Junior Brass Band even though it is never on.
• He somehow manages to get black eyes from tables.
• Loathing tables.
• Being extremely bad at COD (his best kill streak is 4)
• Falling over when kicked in the hamstring

Quotes

• "Ow my eye."
• "I bet I can kick higher than you."
• "Ger ger gi ga ger."
• "No! I died!"
• "I'm melting!"
• "I'm not interested in oranges."
• "Thats purple."
• "You absolute.................sausage." (to a random year 11 that lost John King's bouncy ball)
• "I'm not wet, I'm moist."
• "Eat my dust, it's strawberry flavoured and one of your 5 a day."
• "You may be a black belt at karate but I've got bouncy legs."
• "Go to schnell."
• "OH Ambrose! you got toothpaste all over my pillow!" In Anglesey 2010
• "I learnt a new word...spoonerism!"
• "My favourite word is moist."
• "Insert name here, give me back my insert item here."