Difference between revisions of "Mr Berry"

Latest revision as of 11:04, 12 February 2011

Dave with Charlie Giddins after his successful signing to K.C. Milan

Background

Mr David Berry MBE joined the school in 2008 after being assigned to the Psychology department. Originating from Yorkshire he is the schools resident Leeds Football Club fan and is known for his up-beat, quirky and comical teaching style. He is probably related to Jake Berry.

He enjoys Romantic comedies, table tennis and the odd alcoholic beverage and also has a bizarre soft-spot for the subject of Statistics (which year 13 psychology classes unfortunately must study).

One of (if not) the most popular teachers in the school he quickly rose to prominence within days of beginning his job and leads people to say that he disproves the claim that the only good thing to come out of Yorkshire is the road to Lancashire.

He is often known for telling stories of his younger days as a teacher and also his school career. He isn't seen by pupils very often and his uniform is the opposite of perfection. He would have the most penalty points for uniform if he were a student, he might even be expelled.

One distinguished tale is when he began his Psychology degree at university and for two weeks mistakenly attended lectures for the subject of Podiatry. This caused him some confusion as he was under the illusion that the study of the mind must start from the bottom (feet) to the top (mind). Fortunately his mistake was realised and he soon began to attend the right lectures.

Notable characteristics include his infamous 'unshaven' look which he dons due to the claim that he is "notoriously white". He also possesses a tattoo on his shoulder but is reluctant to show this to his classes.

In addition to this he also has the responsibility of a form in the upper sixth everyday - except monday when he looks after his young son Frank (or when Leeds suffer a loss at the weekend)

In one lesson with a Year 9 class he spent all lesson playing 'find the disney character' on a student's book.

Notable Quotes

"Right my friends" - usually to instigate the start of a lesson

"WE ARE LEEDS" - he chanted this to his psychology classes after Leeds famous victory over Manchester Utd in the F.A cup

"Please, please... there's a desperate Yorkshireman at the front here"

"Well thats just tremendous" - one of his most favourite adjectives when conveying his thoughts at something pleasing

"It's all very exciting" - usually said with a 'camp' intonation

"It has descended into anarchy"

"Hey look I'm an old-fashioned gentleman. I believe that children should not be subjected to rude language and I hold the door open for a lady. So shoot me! Shoot me!" - used as an excuse to Josh Thompson, Matt Archibald, Oliver Blake and Chris Wassell when they wanted to watch a rated R documentary on Sigmund Freud

Dave with a melon

Frank

Frank Berry is Dave's only son and often comes up in conversation in class; usually when Dave is discussing psychological stages of development or (most often) when he can remember something humorous that has occurred involving his son.

He also has bookmarks with his son's picture on them which Dave is always keen to show his students.

Recently, Frank made an appearance (a rare delight) as he accompanied his father on results day 2010. This went down well with pupils, highlighting the comment that he was “a legend in his own time”.

Controversy

Recently during a psychology lesson he revealed that he was not in fact a teacher at all. He claimed that he had, in fact, only visted the school for a routine check-up of the radiators and heating facilities and used the guise of a teacher to gain access. He then went on to say that he has only remained here since to keep up the pretence.

Conflict with Mr Neve

Arch nemesis of Bez and hater of pens on whiteboards, Mr Neve quite often is in the room adjacent to where Mr Berry is teaching. There have been many incidents throughout the year where Neve has stated his disdain at the volume which Dave writes on the whiteboard. Being a Yorkshireman he is rough, loud and relentless; something which Neve finds difficult to tolerate.

However, despite some controversial incidents it is claimed that they are no longer estranged.

Injuries

He claims that he is very injury-prone; noteworthy injuries are:

He has broken his nose 3 times - that he knows of

Constant impact on his hands has led to the development of the ability to consciously dislocate his thumbs - this was demonstrated in class much to the dismay of Josh Thompson and Fran Barratt

A damaged finger was also outlined at the start of the 2009/2010 school year in which he claimed was due to "what can only be described as a thunderbolt" during a staff football match in which he was volunteered to be the goalkeeper.

Revival of Football career

During a Staff v Upper Sixth charity football match Dave showed imense talent and skill in his midfield position augmenting the famous saying that "form is fleeting, class is permanent". The match went to a penalty shoot out in which Dave had the chance to seal it for his team, but was denied by goalkeeper Patrick Mullen. Showing true sportsmanship he went and kissed his opponent after the saved shot. Regardless of this, the Staff still won.

Shortly after he was approached by agent Thomas "Sheepy" Sipocz who was able to arange Dave's signing to the sixth form team K.C Milan. His debut however did not reflect the quality that he had been able to show in previous games, despite this his team still went on to win the match.

He was also approached by the sports department about taking over management of the old Year 9 (2007 intake) football team. He quickly accepted and has already proven that he is the right man for the job after beating rivals Fearns in a crucial grudge match.

His latest involvement was a rematch between the upper sixth and staff. A noble effort by the staff team was displayed but fatigue began to show in the later stages of the game as they succumbed to the higher levels of stamina and endurance that their opponents possessed. The match ended up 3-0 to the upper sixth team.

World Record Attempt for most fails on a Driving test

The Berry Man is infamous for his many attempts to pass his driving test which ended up at a near record breaking 7 attempts.

He drove too fast, too slow but his most extraordinary fail is when he ended up in someones back garden sinking into their pond!

Nevertheless, he is now an accomplished driver who knows the highway code better than anyone (due to the fact that after the 5th attempt it should be imprinted into his brain)

Life before teaching

A topic of debate that often arises during quiz games (One of Daves favourite pastimes) and includes many contributions from pupils.

Suggestions include: Flower arranger at a florists and steward at the M.E.N arena

Second career in entertainment?

Speculation is rife over the claim that Dave might be starting a duet with a fellow teacher. Some say that he has a terrific singing voice. As many of his pupils know he is an avid X factor and Britains Got Talent fan and can often be found discussing such shows with Matt Archibald.

The rumours about his singing ability were then proven to be true when he and the rest of the upper sixth form teachers sang a rendition of the Robbie Williams hit song 'Angels' on the upper sixth fancy dress day to commemorate their time at the 6th form.

Nicknames

Mr Berry has many pet-names given to him by students, notable ones are:

Bez

Bezzer

The Berry Man

or simply Dave