Inez Clarke

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Who?

Inez is in 8G and also likes tractors and rowing machines. Or maybe not so much tractors after "the tractor incident"(see below). She describes Big Brother as "the best thing that happened to the world since Elvis". She is also known for disliking Chris Carter as he keeps teasing her about perverted ice cream men.


Drawing

She is one of the best at graphics and is always doodling any place she can.

The Crew

Inez describes her whole form as "absoloutely amazing" and is good friends with most of them, minus one or two. She is also good friends with Emily Oldfield, Afnan Rao, Lucy Raidy, Mollie Campbell, Danielle Scott and many more! She loves S so much but is sad because it is now full with brilliant people!! She thinks S is amazing and only pretends to like G to save herself from years of torture (but dont tell her)

Quotes

  • "I love you THIS much!!" (almost falls over trying to indicate how much she loves you)
  • "okaaaay..."
  • "G is a reject form. Who likes G anyway? They're all gays."
  • "LEEEEEEEET'S TAPDANCE!!!" (usually in the face of some poor unsuspecting stranger)
  • "In a million zillion trillion years i will be a dinosaur."
  • "AN-DREEEEWWWW!!!"
  • "I hate you."
  • "You scare me."
  • "Do you watch Big Brother?"
  • "OBVIOUSLY!"
  • "OHMYGAWWWD!"
  • "OHEMGEE."
  • "Lolz"
  • (in mystified, disorientated voice) "ooh... shiny."
  • "I would so easily move from 8G if you payed me only 2p." (the number changes according to how desperate she is)

The Tractor Incident

Inez is innocently walking up the road towards weir park with her mates Emily Carter(Whitworth) and Charlie Saywood(Wardle).

  • Emily: "Ewww what the hell is that awful smell?!" (covers nose dramatically)
  • Charlie: (sniffs) "EWWWWWWW!!!" (Also covers nose dramatically) "What IS that?!"
  • Inez: (almost choking because of the foul smell) "I think it's that tractor."

They turn around to see a tractor chugging up the road pulling a trailor which is spewing brown-green poo all over the road.

  • Charlie: "I've got a feeling that if we don't run now we'll get covered in that... stuff."

They look at each other for a few seconds.

  • All: "RUN!!!"

They peg it up the road like headless chickens towards the park. In a flurry to jump behind a wall to safety, Inez trips over her shoelace. Horrified, she looks up to see that the tractor is merely a few metres away. Charlie and Emily are already safely behind the wall. Charlie quickly grabs Inez to try and drag her to safety, but it is too late. The tractor drives past, showering cow poo everywhere. When it has passed, Charlie and Emily reappear from behind the wall. They are both unscathed, but Inez is covered in the horrible muck. Emily looks around, bewildered, until she sees Inez covered in greenish poo.

  • Emily: "Ahahaha! Charlie, look at Nezza! Ahaha!"
  • Charlie: "What? Oh! Ahahaha!"
  • Emily: "Hahaha!!!"
  • Charlie: "Haha!!"

They proceed to repeatedly mock the disgruntled, and smelly, 13-year-old.

  • Two hours later:

Inez, Emily and Charlie are sat on the roundabout in Weir Park. A tractor drives past the opposite way to the one that had showered Inez in poo.

  • Charlie: (Laughing)"Hey Nezza, I wonder if that's the same tractor that covered you in stuff?!"
  • Inez: "Grr..."

The fat guy in the tractor suddenly notices Inez and points at her, laughing uncontrollably. Emily and Charlie look at each other, grinning from ear to ear.

  • Emily: "That's the one,"
  • Charlie: "I think so."

Emily and Charlie: (laughs)

  • Then emily the garidan angel flew over