Josh Cadney

'Mathematical Prodigy'

Error creating thumbnail: Unable to save thumbnail to destination

'Maths is Child's Play for Joshua Cadney'

<math>x^2+y^2 = Cd^2</math>

Cadney Numbers

Josh hopes to publish his Cadney Theory shortly, as well as create a new MEI module for A level maths, called CD1. Cadney numbers are the sums of two square numbers. Josh has now found a method to discover new Cadney Numbers of any type, using a dubious methodology, which will no doubt become clearer in time.

STEP 3

Josh has recently complained about the Leavers Ball being held on the night before his crucial STEP 2 examination. Despite not needing to revise or prepare, Josh still needs a clear head before he goes into the exam room. Unfortunately, such an exam doesn't appear on any cross examboard timetable.

The Many Faces of Josh

Josh Types

Josh recently changed

Josh is an elusive character, with many different faces and appearances. Like Cadney Numbers, they can be classified in types.

1. There is the original Josh, aka Josh 1. This is the actual Josh Cadney, sporting the 'Jesus look'. Recently, this Josh has been missing from school, and may soon be declared legally dead for tax purposes.
2. There is then Lanky Josh, aka Josh 2. This fellow has an uncanny resemblence of the day-to-day Josh, but is about 4 feet taller and 3 stone lighter.
3. The most elusive Josh is Chubby, Not-Woman Josh, aka Josh 3. This Josh has only been spotted by one or two lucky individuals, and was once thought to be a woman, as he/she/it had only been glanced briefly, and appeared to be a female form of regular Josh.
4. The most popular incarnation of Josh is Chav Josh, aka Josh 4. This Josh has exactly the same build and features as Josh 1, though sporting a new shaven (beard and head) look, and with a fondness for all things trackie-pants-and-white-trainers.

So there you have it: Josh, all four of him.

Amusing Quotes

Not by Josh, but to him by a maths teacher. "Joshua, come here please." [There followed a protracted pause during which his classmates looked on, surprised that a maths teacher was appearing to be preparing to give him a 'dressing down']. "Can you check the answer in the book is wrong? Thanks." [At this point we descended into uncontrollable laughter.]

Also Known As

Joshua Cadney